Monthly Archives: January 2015

“Jaw With John” – I Ain’t Saying She A Gold Digger, But She Ain’t Messing With…

I’ve been married for two weeks and frankly I hate my wife. She is completely lazy and pays absolutely no attention to me.

She was so nice when we were dating, but it was probably all just for show.

I come from a “richer type of family” and she comes from a “moderate to low-income family.”

I feel kind of bad for her, but she is so pestering and obnoxious and she probably just married me for my money.

I can’t divorce her because we have a legal document stating that I must give her $70,000 if we separate or divorce, and I’m not that rich. When I signed the document, I figured that by the time we did divorce, if we divorced, I would have that type of money (from growing investments).

My parents are completely NOT on my side. They keep telling me that it’s my fault (which I agree to some extent) and refuse to get involved. — Bad Choice Maker

Dear Bad Choice:

Two weeks!? You’re telling me that she didn’t exhibit ANY of these tendencies while you were dating? I think you just misread the signs here dude. Which leads me to believe that you were thinking with your other head in this instance. Or you’re just that dumb. Your parents are right to stay out of this mess. YOU are solely responsible for this entire situation.

If things don’t change within a few months and you still resent her, and let’s face it you seem to despise her on a cellular level, then I say pay the $70,000 and GTFO.

Tagged , , , , , , , ,

“Jaw With John” – Don’t Wonder “What If?”

I’m a senior in high school and am experiencing some friendship/relationship troubles. There’s a guy from a different school that I’ve known for a while. We have many similar interests and values. We talk often, but I don’t see him regularly because we don’t go to the same school.

I’ve developed feelings for him, and I’m interested in furthering my relationship with him. The only problem is that one of my close friends has expressed a very strong interest in him. I am private about this subject, but she has told many people about her feelings for him.

The guy knows she likes him and has not expressed interest in her. I’m afraid that if I tell her my thoughts, she’ll feel betrayed and will distance herself from me. I don’t want to ruin our friendship. What am I supposed to do? — Torn Friend

Dear Torn:

Maybe this guy hasn’t expressed interest in your friend because he doesn’t like her. And if that’s the case then if the two of you hit it off and she is left flailing in the wind then she will most likely resent you. It’s almost a no win scenario between you and your friend regardless of what you do. Tell this guy how you feel because if he finds someone else, or you do nothing at all, then you’re left wondering “What if?”. It is then that you will hate yourself even more for not doing something. Your friend may move on, or she may not. Either way, don’t let her feelings stand in the way of you possibly being happy.

Tagged , , , , ,

“Jaw With John” – Pants On Fire? Let ‘Em Burn

I am a 56-year-old woman. For most of my life I have been a liar. I’ve told small lies and really big ones — all mostly for the purpose of not wanting to hurt someone else’s feelings.

I have told a few lies I wish I had never told, and I realize I can only blame myself. Amazingly, no one has ever called me on any of my lies.

I’m now at an age where I’m having a hard time keeping my “stories” straight. Also, I feel like I don’t really care anymore about other people’s feelings, and that I just want to be able to do what I want without having to lie. I want to look at myself in the mirror without seeing a liar staring back at me.

What should I do? — Pants on Fire

Dear Pants:

As Lady Gaga says “Do what u want”. You told lies to keep from hurting people’s feelings and now you don’t really care about other people’s feelings, so why NOW should it matter that you can’t keep your “‘stories’ straight”? If they call you out on it own up to it and move on since you clearly don’t have a conscience.

Tagged , , , , ,

“Jaw With John” – Paper Purloiner Has No Shame

My husband and I have the newspaper delivered to our condo building each day, but we have noticed that if we don’t retrieve it from the lobby by about 8:30 a.m., it’s already gone.

We think that other condo owners take our paper. It would be annoying under any circumstance, but in this high-end building, all the unit owners are well heeled and can easily afford their own subscription.

It seems the height of pettiness to pinch someone else’s paper, and I would like to bring it up at a board meeting in a respectful way (just stating that we notice our paper is gone before we get to it, does anyone know why, does anyone else have the problem, and so on) but my husband says doing so won’t change anyone’s behavior; they will do what they will do.

I say that it’s a cop-out not to call this to the attention of the condo owners in the hope that the possible culprit/culprits may feel at least a little ashamed, whether they stop doing it or not. What is your take on this? — Miffed

Dear Miffed:

This is just not cool. Straight up. Here’s what you should do, before you go to the condo board meeting, have a stake out! Watch your paper for a few days in a row and see who is taking it. Then a few days down the line, when the thief shows up to take the paper again, BOOM you caught ’em in the act! They’ll deny it but then you can provide evidence countering their argument. You can then take that to the condo board if they don’t fess up – essentially blackmail – but at this point you are beyond half measures. It’s time for full measures.

Tagged , , , , , , , , ,

Taking The Granddaddy For Granted

Five to six days a week I find myself standing in the shadow of the Rose Bowl and I stare blankly at its pillars and columns as I stretch my muscles before and after I run. It’s “America’s Stadium” yet feeling numb to the history and legacy that is The Rose Bowl almost makes me feel un-American.

Every new year brings on the Rose Bowl Game and it’s something that I have always looked forward to. I went because I enjoy watching football and going to the game. I never truly cared who was playing. This feeling enhanced once I got to college and discovered that my school cut football in 1992, long before I got there, even though they had won an Orange Bowl (1950) and two Sugar Bowls (1937,1938)…but that’s another story for another time.

IMG_2938

If I couldn’t find someone who had tickets I would end up going down to the stadium, cash in hand, and procure my tickets through another vendor – aka scalp. I was always successful. Up until yesterday’s game I had only missed one Rose Bowl game since 1999 and that was the 2006 USC v. Texas BCS National Championship. I chose not to go this year because I financially couldn’t. Not having a real full-time job doesn’t help.

But it was also due to game fatigue.

I decided I would rather spend the day in my pajamas, where the line for the concessions and restroom were much shorter and I didn’t have to spend any money. As it turns out, I missed witnessing a blow out. That made me feel better about my decision to stay home.

IMG_1226

New Year’s Day was all about the Game for me. I couldn’t care less about the Rose Parade. I wanted to watch football. Every year people flock to Pasadena from all over the country and world for this game. They come to see their teams compete in one of the greatest venues in all of sports. Throughout the years I have seen Michigan and Wisconsin lose multiple Rose Bowl’s in a row, Hall of Fame coaches, blow outs (Oklahoma-Washington St) and close games (Oregon-Wisconsin), a parade of Heisman Trophy winners, and a National Champion crowned in The University of Miami.

But it doesn’t mean much to me.

I first noticed this apathy after Ohio St beat Oregon in 2010. I was standing out in front of the stadium in my green Nike sweatshirt and apparently I looked sad enough to be consoled by a few Buckeye fans. I smiled politely, but didn’t tell them I have only been to the state of Oregon once. I then overheard a pair of them say to one another “We just won the Rose Bowl!” It was then that I looked up at the neon “Rose Bowl” sign, lit up in the twilight of that January 1st, and reflected that this place, this game, meant so much more than the value I placed on it. Maybe this can be traced to the fact that my university doesn’t have a football team so I am forced to look elsewhere to get my pigskin fix. Or maybe I have been exposed to the Rose Bowl Game for so long that it has lost it’s meaning.

I honestly don’t know.

IMG_2945

To some it’s their Mecca. To me it is just a stadium that I run around to stay fit and train for races.

 

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,