Tag Archives: Advice

22/04/2015
2 Comments
Advice

“Jaw With John” – After Four Months Your Lips Are Dry

“I met someone through eHarmony and have been seeing him for four months.

He is kind and attentive. He doesn’t smoke, drink or gamble. He has a steady, well-paying job. Neither of us has previous relationship experience, and he often thanks me for being so patient with him.

However, after four months he says he is still not ready to kiss me. Is it too much to expect some sort of physical expression after four months?

He is thoughtful in every other way, but I am very frustrated.

I now feel that the spark is gone. I don’t regret meeting him and would like him to remain a part of my life, but as a friend rather than a romantic partner.

Is there a way to ignite the chemistry? Will it come as he builds his comfort level?

Should I stay with him even if I’m left unsatisfied and jealous of other happy couples? — Hoping for More”

Dear Hoping:

The dude won’t kiss you? You must feel like Never Been Kissed except you’re not in high school or disguising yourself to look like a high school student for a newspaper and you’ve been kissed before…moving on!

There are two scenarios here that I believe to be the most plausible given your situation. #1 He’s gay OR #2 He’s just not that into you.

I’ve been where you are Hoping and you just need to express your feelings and tell him or else you’re doomed to wonder “what if?” or “what’s wrong with me?” and it will drive you insane. Four months of dating without a kiss is kinda bullshit and you know it.

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , ,
18/04/2015
Leave a comment
Advice

“Jaw With John” – Your Husband Is Tobias Funke Now

“My husband and I are in our 50s with grown children who are on their own. We are youthful and healthy and, up until recently, our marriage was monogamous. Some time ago, we talked at length about sexual experimentation in the form of “open” marriage.

In fact, my husband was the one who suggested the idea, and we struck a deal. We agreed that if I wanted to get involved with someone else, it would be OK with him and he would feel free to do the same.

Well, I did and he didn’t.

Even though it’s only a once-in-a-while thing for me (with one man), I’m finding it very enjoyable, almost addictive. My husband and I get along well and still share an active sexual life, but he’s feeling slighted because he hasn’t found anyone else, and now he’s pressuring me to end my relationship.

The other man wants to continue, and to be perfectly honest, so do I.

My husband admits that if he also had “something going” right now, he would be OK with my relationship. The only one feeling left out at the moment is the guy who started this whole thing. What should I do? — Part of a Triangle”

Dear Part:

I’ll just leave this Tobias Funke moment from Arrested Development here:

And then your husband’s reaction, presumably, to your new found sexual relationship here:

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
18/04/2015
Leave a comment
Advice

“Jaw With John” – GILF Status Unlocked

“I am 75 years old — active, attractive and feel like I’m 25.

I’m enrolled at a community college taking courses in ceramics. One of my fellow students has suddenly taken an interest in me. He is a nice guy and we share many interests. The problem is, I am not at all attracted to him. He has indicated he would like to become involved. I don’t want to hurt his feelings, but I do want him to know that we can never be more than friends. How do I do this diplomatically? — Alive and Kickin’”

Dear Kickin’:

Maybe if you tried Ghost-ing with this nice guy you’d change your mind. Unless your ceramics class has a “Zero Ghost Tolerance Policy”.

And if even after Ghost-ing (if allowed) with him you still don’t have feelings for him, then you just need to tell him that you think he’s a nice guy but you don’t like him “that way.” It’ll hurt him a bit, but it will let him down easy.

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , ,
15/04/2015
Leave a comment
Advice

“Jaw With John” – Girl, Get With Me

“I really like this girl. I think she’s perfect in every way. She has just come out of a two-year relationship, and she told my friend that she just wants to be single when he asked her out.

We get on really well, and whenever we talk there seems to be something there. People have noticed her flirting with me.

Should I ask her to get with me or not? — Dan”

Dear Dan:

I don’t believe that there has ever been a moment in dating history where asking a girl to “get with me” has ever worked.

Try something else.

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , ,
15/04/2015
Leave a comment
Advice

“Jaw With John” – Think Of The Children!

“If a married woman answers the door wearing only a bath towel when her husband’s brother (who happens to be married to me) is at the door and her husband is not at home, is that appropriate?

She shows no regard for modesty. In her yard she will carelessly bend over in a loose-fitting tank top (bra-less, of course), not even trying to hold up the neck to spare those in her presence the view.

My husband and I have argued over this issue, and everyone knows my sentiments on this “misconduct.”

I feel this behavior is disrespectful to me. My husband should consider my feelings and honor me by telling her that this conduct is inappropriate. When I suggested that he tell her that her behavior is offensive and unwelcome, he became defensive and said that I was behaving jealously.

Am I crazy because I have a “problem” with this? — BS”

Dear BS:

She sounds rather busty or else this wouldn’t be much of an issue.

She’s obviously very, very comfortable in her own skin and is willing to share it with the world. My concern here is that she’s not wearing a bra. Studies have shown that not wearing a bra could lead to back problems. You could slip some scoliosis literature under her door to send a message.

Or you could just outright tell her that she needs to cover up, but I do believe that you should be the one to her. If your husband were to do so it might not come out right and it could look as if he’s creeping on her/checking her out. She may then take that as a sign of flirtation and invitation to bed him OR she could call him a pervert and out him to her husband. She could do the same to you but it seems like she only plays for one team here.

And if those options are not your cup of tea, you could go all Helen Lovejoy:

 

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
← Older posts
Newer posts →