Tag Archives: Advice

08/01/2015
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Advice

“Jaw With John” – Noisy Kids Lead to Problems in Bed, Literally

“My husband and I have been living in our apartment for the past three years and generally enjoy it. However, the couple that lives in the apartment directly above us have custody of the husband’s two children (elementary age) every other weekend.

I know this not because they have told me, but because without fail on these mornings we wake up to the shrill screams of the daughter while the son antagonizes her. This quickly leads to the father bellowing and general chaos for several minutes.

If we do manage to fall back asleep we will be awakened again when the children come barreling down the staircase, yelling and pushing one another.

I am a teacher; I truly and honestly understand that children are not and should not be placid all the time. But am I wrong to think that the adults should have more control over the situation?

The children scream and carry on at other times of the day as well, but I can choose not to care about that because it’s during my waking hours.

Is there any way that I can leave a self-help book about parenting while sharing custody at their front door without looking passive-aggressive?

Kids in a classroom benefit from structure and classroom management, so how do I gently suggest these parents try the same? — Sleepless in Baltimore”

Dear Sleepless:

You can’t try and tell someone how to raise their kids. It’s just bad form.

How early are these kids waking up and screaming? 5am? 6am? Because that would be early. Being an early riser, I am of the opinion that getting up at 7:30 counts as sleeping in. But that’s just me. Stop being lazy, go to bed and get up at a decent hour! Because if I were to find out that these kids were getting up at 9am and being loud and you were mad about that…I would lose it. I mean, gardeners are allowed to operate their machinery after 7:30am and I think a lawnmower is much louder than two kids. Suck it up.

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08/01/2015
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Advice

“Jaw With John” – I Ain’t Saying She A Gold Digger, But She Ain’t Messing With…

“I’ve been married for two weeks and frankly I hate my wife. She is completely lazy and pays absolutely no attention to me.

She was so nice when we were dating, but it was probably all just for show.

I come from a “richer type of family” and she comes from a “moderate to low-income family.”

I feel kind of bad for her, but she is so pestering and obnoxious and she probably just married me for my money.

I can’t divorce her because we have a legal document stating that I must give her $70,000 if we separate or divorce, and I’m not that rich. When I signed the document, I figured that by the time we did divorce, if we divorced, I would have that type of money (from growing investments).

My parents are completely NOT on my side. They keep telling me that it’s my fault (which I agree to some extent) and refuse to get involved. — Bad Choice Maker”

Dear Bad Choice:

Two weeks!? You’re telling me that she didn’t exhibit ANY of these tendencies while you were dating? I think you just misread the signs here dude. Which leads me to believe that you were thinking with your other head in this instance. Or you’re just that dumb. Your parents are right to stay out of this mess. YOU are solely responsible for this entire situation.

If things don’t change within a few months and you still resent her, and let’s face it you seem to despise her on a cellular level, then I say pay the $70,000 and GTFO.

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08/01/2015
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Advice

“Jaw With John” – Don’t Wonder “What If?”

“I’m a senior in high school and am experiencing some friendship/relationship troubles. There’s a guy from a different school that I’ve known for a while. We have many similar interests and values. We talk often, but I don’t see him regularly because we don’t go to the same school.

I’ve developed feelings for him, and I’m interested in furthering my relationship with him. The only problem is that one of my close friends has expressed a very strong interest in him. I am private about this subject, but she has told many people about her feelings for him.

The guy knows she likes him and has not expressed interest in her. I’m afraid that if I tell her my thoughts, she’ll feel betrayed and will distance herself from me. I don’t want to ruin our friendship. What am I supposed to do? — Torn Friend”

Dear Torn:

Maybe this guy hasn’t expressed interest in your friend because he doesn’t like her. And if that’s the case then if the two of you hit it off and she is left flailing in the wind then she will most likely resent you. It’s almost a no win scenario between you and your friend regardless of what you do. Tell this guy how you feel because if he finds someone else, or you do nothing at all, then you’re left wondering “What if?”. It is then that you will hate yourself even more for not doing something. Your friend may move on, or she may not. Either way, don’t let her feelings stand in the way of you possibly being happy.

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05/01/2015
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Advice

“Jaw With John” – Pants On Fire? Let ‘Em Burn

“I am a 56-year-old woman. For most of my life I have been a liar. I’ve told small lies and really big ones — all mostly for the purpose of not wanting to hurt someone else’s feelings.

I have told a few lies I wish I had never told, and I realize I can only blame myself. Amazingly, no one has ever called me on any of my lies.

I’m now at an age where I’m having a hard time keeping my “stories” straight. Also, I feel like I don’t really care anymore about other people’s feelings, and that I just want to be able to do what I want without having to lie. I want to look at myself in the mirror without seeing a liar staring back at me.

What should I do? — Pants on Fire”

Dear Pants:

As Lady Gaga says “Do what u want”. You told lies to keep from hurting people’s feelings and now you don’t really care about other people’s feelings, so why NOW should it matter that you can’t keep your “‘stories’ straight”? If they call you out on it own up to it and move on since you clearly don’t have a conscience.

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03/01/2015
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Advice

“Jaw With John” – Paper Purloiner Has No Shame

“My husband and I have the newspaper delivered to our condo building each day, but we have noticed that if we don’t retrieve it from the lobby by about 8:30 a.m., it’s already gone.

We think that other condo owners take our paper. It would be annoying under any circumstance, but in this high-end building, all the unit owners are well heeled and can easily afford their own subscription.

It seems the height of pettiness to pinch someone else’s paper, and I would like to bring it up at a board meeting in a respectful way (just stating that we notice our paper is gone before we get to it, does anyone know why, does anyone else have the problem, and so on) but my husband says doing so won’t change anyone’s behavior; they will do what they will do.

I say that it’s a cop-out not to call this to the attention of the condo owners in the hope that the possible culprit/culprits may feel at least a little ashamed, whether they stop doing it or not. What is your take on this? — Miffed”

Dear Miffed:

This is just not cool. Straight up. Here’s what you should do, before you go to the condo board meeting, have a stake out! Watch your paper for a few days in a row and see who is taking it. Then a few days down the line, when the thief shows up to take the paper again, BOOM you caught ’em in the act! They’ll deny it but then you can provide evidence countering their argument. You can then take that to the condo board if they don’t fess up – essentially blackmail – but at this point you are beyond half measures. It’s time for full measures.

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