Tag Archives: Graduate School

04/05/2015
Leave a comment
Advice

“Jaw With John” – She’ll Get The Next One

“I am a high school teacher in my mid-20s. I am saving to move out of my parents’ home and go to graduate school. Needless to say, every penny counts.

Recently I have noticed a trend with my friend every time we go out for dinner, grab a coffee, take a cab or simply any time money is involved. She has a mentality of “You get this one, I’ll get the next.” The problem is, sometimes there isn’t a “next,” or the “next” is forgotten and I end up holding the bag. This seems to happen the most with cab rides where I have cash and she doesn’t. Then, if reminded, she shrugs it off with, “Yup, I owe you one.”

I can barely afford to pay my own way. I love my friend dearly but do not know how to approach this. Will I risk insulting her? — Unwilling Warbucks”

Dear Warbucks:

You tell her straight up “No, you’re gonna pay your share” or “You’re gonna get this one since you owe me more than one.” Either that or forget your wallet altogether so that she’ll have to pay. Also! Doesn’t she know that cabs now accept credit cards…she’s just making excuses and you know what excuses are? Excuses are like butt-holes: everyone has one and they alllllll stink.

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
05/02/2015
Leave a comment
Advice

“Jaw With John” – That Girl Is Poison

“I have a friend who is not really a friend at all. We attend graduate school together. What started out as being in the same study group and saying “hello” in the hallway has turned into a toxic relationship that I can’t endure.

“Emily” always has a million problems, which she deems much worse than what anyone else is going through. For instance, when I told her my childhood pet was very sick and needed to be put to sleep, she told me to “quit throwing myself a pity party” because she had “real” problems.

I have tried just listening politely to her problems, then started distancing myself from her, but this only led to her becoming needier.

She regularly asks for updates on where I am, what I’m doing, what I’m eating, etc., and passes judgment on all aspects of my life.

I have gently informed her I am an adult and do not appreciate this unsolicited advice or being burdened with her problems, but nothing seems to work. I do not know what else to do.

The school is small, and we still have a few years left together, so I don’t want to blow her off completely and risk seeming unprofessional, but I also can’t tolerate her anymore. Do you have suggestions for “breaking up” with her as gracefully as possible? — Fed Up with “Frenemy””

Dear Fed Up:

Do what I did to a few girls I briefly dated: just slowly cut off communication with them so that they get the hint. Yes, I know, I’m an asshole for doing that and I’ve since learned that’s now how a relationship should end. But this girl sounds like she needs this exact treatment. Wean her off of you because “that girl is poison.”

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,