Tag Archives: JWJ

“Jaw With John” – Take You To Church You’ll Worship Like A Dog

I’m curious to know what you think of someone asking a semi-stranger, “What church do you go to?” or, even worse, “Do you go to church?”

It seems as intrusive as asking “How much do you weigh?” or “How much money do you make?” or “Are your kids gay or straight?”

Maybe churches today are trying to grow their memberships, but the way I was raised, someone’s personal relationship with God was PERSONAL.

I know people like to categorize, but to me the question is rude.

Am I just out of step? — Offended

Dear Offended:

You’re out of step.

Maybe this dude is trying to find a church to attend. Of course churches want to grow their memberships. If they didn’t then they would’ve died out long ago with the people who founded them!

I fail to see how this church question equates to the questions you posed as intrusive. You sound very cloistered in your worship and faith which, let’s face it, is not what being religious and being one with God is all about. It’s about inclusion and learning and growing with others. You’re probably the guy in the last row of the church, tucked alllllllll the way into the corner where no one else is around because you want your space in your church. Newsflash Padre: That’s not very Christian.

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“Jaw With John” – Throw A Flag At The Creepy Old Guy

I recently invited an acquaintance, “Al,” to a TV sports viewing party. He invited his friend “Ed” to join us.

Al and Ed have known each other their entire lives, but I had never met Ed before. They are both 70 years old.

After the game ended, we three were talking when Ed suddenly said to me, “So, what are we going to do now, make love?” Then, a few minutes later he said, “When I’m driving my car, you can pay off a bet.” I had not made any sports bets with him. He was alluding to a sexual act.

Al did not hear the crass questions. I ignored Ed’s offensive behavior.

Both Al and I are decent, kind and considerate people. I was dressed conservatively in sports attire. We were kind and welcoming to Ed. All of my friends are well-mannered and courteous.

Ed’s offensive remarks were negative and insulting. He did not drink alcohol and no drugs were present, so what gives? I told Al about this and he did not know why Ed acted offensively.

What could I have said to Ed to fend off both remarks?

Also I do not trust Ed, and he knows where I live.

What can I do proactively to protect myself? — Proper and Puzzled Gal

Dear Proper:

I am literally confused here. Your wording perplexes me.

I assume Ed was trying to be funny, and obviously came off as a creepy old man. His remark about the bet – I have no idea. It LITERALLY makes zero sense to me. Maybe he thinks you’re someone else who he made a bet with, but still, I have no idea what he means here. I’m as confused as you are. Or maybe he was just very horny that day?

Trust me, all of your friends are not well-mannered and courteous. You’re being very naive.

Now you’re being paranoid here when you talk about protecting yourself. The Super Bowl was three weeks ago, has he stopped by since? If he does then you can ignore him and if that doesn’t work, call the police. Otherwise you’re making a mountain out of molehill for a creepy old guy.

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“Jaw With John” – What’s In A Name?

The birth of my children has caused my father and me to reconnect after many years of no contact. During that time, he remarried (for the third time) a very nice lady who has been instrumental in getting us back on speaking terms. She always sends a gift for birthdays and Christmas. My wife and I like her.

She likes to refer to herself as “Grandma.” My wife doesn’t mind but it just doesn’t sit well with me. For one thing, I don’t want to confuse our very young kids, and for another, my mother passed away 10 years ago, and I know for a fact if she were here and got wind of this she would be very upset. Mom was a tough, take-no-nonsense fighter and she wouldn’t stand for this.

For my father’s wife to call herself “Grandma” seems disrespectful. It took years to get my dad and me to speak. I don’t want to ruin that by insulting his wife, but I also don’t want to confuse our kids or dishonor my mother’s memory. — Upset Son

Dear Upset:

This seems stupid and petty. This woman has been very kind to you and your family and you’re angry over a name. Kids all over the Earth have multiple grandparents yet they don’t get confused. I had a different grandpa, who wasn’t my Dad’s Dad, and I was told that he wasn’t my biological grandpa but it didn’t phase me and I still called him Grandpa.

Why wouldn’t your Mom “stand for this”? There is no nonsense here. It’s a name.

For homework: recall The Bard, Shakespeare, in this instance to bring to light your plight:

What’s in a name? That which we call a rose
By any other name would smell as sweet
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“Jaw With John” – You Love Lamp

I recently left a difficult living situation, sharing a house with two roommates.

About two months before I moved out, one of my roommates asked if I would like a lamp that her friend was giving away. She had eyes on another lamp this friend was getting rid of and offered to bring both home, giving one to me. I loved the lamp and thanked her profusely.

Shortly thereafter I moved out, taking my things (including the lamp) with me.

Said roommate contacted me a month later. She said she never intended to give me the lamp and that she would like to have it back.

I am not sure how our understanding of the situation came to be so different, and I am struggling to find a moral high road. — Between a Lamp and a Hard Place

Dear Lamp:

She offered you the lamp. You accepted. She gave you the lamp. End of story.

Does she not remember this interaction? Seriously, ask her if she remembers that you had that discussion and that she GAVE YOU THE LAMP. If she fights you and now wants it back, then you’ll need to decide if you want the lamp that badly. I think you do, it sounds like an awesome lamp. I have one next to my bed that I LOVE. I know how you feel. Don’t give in to your friend. She gave you the lamp, you should keep it.

 

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“Jaw With John” – You Get What You Give

I have a large family and we celebrate family birthdays at a monthly get-together with a potluck dinner. The dinner is always held at my house and I usually furnish the entree.

One granddaughter and her husband never contribute anything and never bring birthday cards for the honored family members. I have specifically asked her to bring something, and I made it easy by suggesting something simple like a Jell-O salad — but still, they bring nothing. Others are beginning to complain. Should I tell her that others are wondering why she never contributes to the meal? These two always eat.

I don’t want to alienate them from the rest of the family, as we all love them and want them with us. — Wondering Gramma

Dear Gramma:

Large family eh? Sounds like you were busy? Wink wink nudge nudge.

Stay with me here because everything will make sense, I swear. Around Christmas time my family has a saying “If you don’t believe, you don’t receive.” Meaning, if you fail to believe in Santa, you will not receive any presents. It’s a way to keep that childlike spirit of Christmas around even as an adult when you know the truth. It’s not really enforced but it’s still around.

Tell your granddaughter that if they don’t feel the need to participate that when it comes time to celebrate their birthday then they will receive what they gave: nothing. It doesn’t take much to buy a card and sign it or, hell, even buy a gift card. They are doing the least possible and need to know that it is unacceptable. This will send the message loud and clear.

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