“My 21-year-old daughter broke up with her boyfriend of four years, “Bradley,” about six months ago. It was the right decision for her and she has moved on.
From what my daughter tells me, he was devastated. Bradley is a hardworking young man who put himself through college and has plans to continue his education. My husband and I offered guidance to him when he was with our daughter, as his family was not able to. He was like a son to us.
My husband and I are grieving! Bradley spent countless hours in our home. He was part of our family.
We have seen him once since the breakup and have exchanged a couple of short emails.
In hindsight, I realize we should not have allowed ourselves to get so attached.
Knowing this situation, what are your thoughts on us staying in touch with him? My head tells me that we should not, but my heart says otherwise. — Saddened Parent”
Dear Saddened:
This LITERALLY sounds like one of the plot points from Meet The Parents. You guys are the Robert DeNiro, Blythe Danner couple and this ex-boyfriend is Owen Wilson. You will need to be careful how this friendship develops and how you cultivate it around your daughter, just like in the movie – although that was under entirely different, and fictional, circumstances. Because if you’re not careful, the next think you know you’ll be carving a beech tree and palling around making your daughters new boyfriend uncomfortable because he’s a male nurse and that’s funny because he’s a man in a predominantly woman’s profession even though there are plenty of male nurses in the world…
OK, be honest with your daughter about this friendship and she will be honest with you. Otherwise you’re close to becoming the plot of a movie that came out 15 years ago.
John Kidde Writes 