Tag Archives: Vacation

23/07/2018
Leave a comment
Advice

Dear John: Family Would Turn Vacation Into Trip From Hell

“Charlotte” and I have been friends for 16 years, ever since we met in college. She lives several states away, so we see each other only once a year when she and her family come to town for a long weekend. Beyond this annual get-together, we never chat on the phone, and communication is pretty much limited to social media.

I have known Charlotte’s (now) husband for 16 years as well, and never cared for him. When they became engaged, none of our friends thought she would actually marry him. He seems to get worse every time I see him, and it has reached the point that I can barely stand to be in the same room with him.

Unfortunately, Charlotte’s kids take after their dad. They are spoiled, nasty, mean children and a bad influence on my young son. Charlotte and her family were in town for their annual visit recently. Afterward I told my husband I didn’t enjoy it and dread the next one.

Charlotte’s husband has now suggested they tag along on our next family vacation! It would ruin our trip. I don’t want to go on vacation if they come with us. Charlotte is still as sweet and lovely as ever, but I do not want to see her husband or children again. What should I do? — HANGING ON FOR NOW

Dear Hanging On,

“What should I do?”??? You tell them “No.”

It’s your vacation. Your time. Your trip. You decide if you want someone else there with you. You rarely see these people so it wouldn’t hurt if you said that this was your vacation and not theirs.

Tagged , , , , , , , , ,
16/05/2018
Leave a comment
Advice

Dear John: A Free Room With No View, And You’re Complaining?

What do you do if your friends have graciously given you several nights free at a lovely beach hotel, but your room faces a huge wall covered by a black tarp — a construction site? We’ve been told that no other rooms are available. — ROOM WITH NO VIEW

Dear Room,

You suck it up. You were given a FREE ROOM. F – R – E – E, free.

Also, isn’t the point of vacation to actually go somewhere and not spend it at the hotel the entire time? Get out, lather up with SPF 50, and enjoy the beach and the free room.

Tagged , , , , , , , , ,
12/09/2015
Leave a comment
Advice

“Jaw With John” – Waterfront Property Attracts Kids, Don’t Tell Jared

“We have a vacation home where we go sometimes on the weekends. Our neighbors seem to view our place as a public kids’ camp. More than any other place, we seem to be a magnet for their unsupervised kids! We regularly end up with other kids in our water, playing with our toys, even asking us for refreshments or running through our house. I’ll admit it is a little flattering to be viewed as fun, but we really need some boundaries.

One time a parent asked if her child could play with ours. When we responded “of course” and assumed she would stay to observe, she proceeded to leave her child with us while she went out for the afternoon!

But often it’s just the kids who run over to our place on their own. We don’t know if their parents know where they are. Honestly we don’t understand the attraction because we offer nothing more than what they already have at their own place, except perhaps parental supervision! We’ve even tried to say, “we need some family time now,” only to have them sit on the edge of the property and stare and wait to rejoin us.

With the increased volume, the focused attention required with kids around water and the extra clean up, by the end of the day it’s all so exhausting! How do we put a stop to being viewed as free daycare, free lifeguarding and free entertainment while not straining those relationships? — Exhausted from “Relaxing””

Dear Exhausted:

Let me clear something up right now, it’s not your water because you don’t own it. You own the coastline and if you have a dock then that’s yours too but you don’t own the water.

The parent who left their child with you is clearly irresponsible and when you saw them again you should’ve said “When you asked to have your child over, we assumed you were going to be watching over him/her. Next time, he/she isn’t allowed unless you’re present. We’re not running a daycare center…unless you want to pay us.”

To combat this you could put up a fence. That’s the most dramatic response but I don’t think you want that. You sound like you enjoy their company, to an extent. That’s why you need to meet their parents and see if they have their and your your permission to play on your property. But it’s ultimately up to you to approve and be vigilant. If one or multiple kids show up you’ll need to call their parents and see if they know where they are and if you will allow them to play.

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
06/08/2015
Leave a comment
Advice

“Jaw With John” – Watt’s the Matter With Your Friends … And You

“For many years I have been the designated driver for my friends who cannot drive for a number of reasons.

When I drove a gas-guzzling car, they would put something in the kitty for gas when I drove them.

Now that I have an electric car they never offer to help.

On the whole I don’t mind, but when I recently drove a friend around for six days during her vacation, never was a cent (or a meal/wine/etc.) offered to help defray the costs.

How should I respond? — A Bit Disgusted”

Dear Disgusted:

“Put something in the kitty”? If was a 12-year-old boy I’d be laughing at how inappropriate that sounds…Since I’m a 28-year-old man…I still laugh at it. Who says things like that?

Watt (see what I did there?) would you have them do? Give you money for your electric bill? I don’t get you electric car people. You ditched the gas-guzzler so you could SAVE money and now that you have an electric car you want them to GIVE you money for driving…? What??? And some places they have charging stations so you’re “filling up” for free! You can’t have your cake and eat it too.

But, and a big J-Lo butt…

I will agree that your friend should have offered to pay for a meal, a drink, hell – even parking would’ve been beneficial and appreciated by you! She’s clearly clueless as to how to act around people.

In the future suggest “Hey guys since I drove, would you mind buying me a burger? Or paying for parking?”

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , ,
22/04/2015
Leave a comment
Advice

“Jaw With John” – This Isn’t Project X, That’s Too Many People

“I invited a friend and her family (husband and two children) to vacation with us at my parents’ home this summer.

My parents were willing to host all of us (four adults and four children) in their home.

While at a party at my friend’s home, one guest, a friend of hers, commented that our summer plans sounded like fun. In response, my friend invited her friend and two children to my parents’ home for this trip.

My friend turned to me, in front of her friend and others, and asked if it was OK that they join us.

I felt as if I were backed into a corner and had to be amenable to the invitation or risk upsetting and/or angering someone.

I told my parents about the recent development and they were quite upset that my friend invited others to their home without consulting them.

Including my parents, there will be 13 people staying at my parents’ home for five nights. My parents are older and I cannot expect them to feed all of these guests, invited or not, during their stay.

I am not sure how to handle this situation without upsetting or angering anyone.

I want to put stipulations upon the visit, for instance, guests provide their own food, beverages, linens, etc., for their stay, but how? — Taken Advantage Of”

Dear Taken:

“I don’t know who you are. I don’t know what you want. If you are looking for ransom I can tell you I don’t have money, but what I do have are a very particular set of skills. Skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my daughter go now that’ll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you, but if you don’t, I will look for you, I will find you and I will kill you.”

Sorry, I had to. I mean, you responded with “Taken” so I ran with it…

But seriously, this is all on you. You could’ve easily taken the reins and said “I’m sorry but the house is already full enough as it is.” But you didn’t and now you need to go over to this friend of hers and tell her that she is no longer invited. For future reference: grow a pair.

You can say “I talked it over with my parents and while they would enjoy your company it would be too many people under one roof for them to accommodate.” In this situation you cannot be concerned with angering people since it’s not just you who is affected by the situation. It just needs to be done.

The friend you originally invited is also a bad guest. She thought that since she was going that she could invite anyone she wanted. That’s just poor etiquette.

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,