“I am the mother of three children who enjoy going to my mom and stepfather’s house to spend the night. The issue is that my stepfather smokes in their home and vehicle.
I have spoken to them and stated that my husband and I do not want our children around smoking. I asked that he not smoke in the home and car when our children are there.
My children have come home and told us that he continues to smoke in their presence.
My children also tell us that they don’t eat at times when they are there, and do not take baths after playing outside with pets.
I do know that the couple’s cleanliness is not the greatest. Their dog has been ill with untreated illnesses.
*Due to all these factors I have decided not to let my children in the home. It is my job to protect them, and I feel my mom and stepfather should respect my wishes.
*Am I overreacting? And how should I handle this situation, since saying something before has not changed anything. — Protective Mother”
Dear Mother:
Smoking is one of the most disgusting habits in the world. Tobacco smoking that is, the “sticky icky” is a whole other ball of wax. I work with quite a few people who do smoke and, honestly, it gets me frustrated and sick whenever I see them smoking. The fact that your stepfather is doing this around children REALLY bothers me. He should know better and you need to tell him face to face that he needs to not smoke in their presence.
“They don’t eat at times”? What does that mean? Are they skipping meals or are they just not snacking a lot? You need to be more specific here because if it’s just snacking then that’s probably for the best, but if it’s a full on meal then you’ve got a bigger problem.
I once went an entire week not showering or changing my underwear. True story. It was Boy Scout camp and my “bath” was jumping into the ocean and then marching up to my tent, through the dirt and mud and sand. Kids will get dirty, it’s part of being a child. Your parents seem to let kids be kids.
*Sigh* You need to voice your opinion and let your parents know that you will not tolerate smoking in front of or around your children. Otherwise, that smoke is going right up your butt.
